Gym agony and ecstacy

I went to Curves today for the first time in 6 months. Yes, I know. I've wasted almost R1000 the last 6 months. I've been a lazy sod, not going to deny that. It felt good. First, because while I am going to probably be a bit sore and stiff later today my body feels good. Second, when they weighed me in February I weighed 89kg. This morning I weigh 84. That's not bad considering I've stuffed my face countless times with really bad food, I've not been eating as well as I should and it's been so cold this winter I've guzzled my way through a swimming pool of tea.

Scout's honour and all that, I will be back there on Friday. And Monday, and Wednesday and Friday...you get the picture.

A conversation overheard...

At the gym this week the ladies have been trying to be inventive. Out with the ABBA remixed rubbish and in with Club Anthems remixed cds. Also rubbish.

Between gasping for breath and trying not to flood the place with sweat...

Old Lady : Oh this is something new.

Middle Aged Lady : The music?

Old Lady : Yes. I must say I don't like it.

Middle Aged Lady : Yes, I agree. It's not good music.

Old Lady : In my day, we could actually sing along to the music.

Middle Aged Lady : In my day we listened to U2. (U2 song playing in background with a hard beat to it). We didn't listen to this rubbish. I don't even know what this song is! (so much for being a U2 fan...)

Friday weigh in

So a month in and what are the results you may be wondering?

I've picked up 1.7kg (that's almost 4lbs).....

But I have also lost a whopping 21.5cm (about 10 inches) from all over my body!

7cm of those from just around my waist.

You think the gym is doing it's thing? I do.

My boobs are shrinking

After my 6th gym session, I made an appointment with one of the trainers to be smart carded on the Curves smart card system. It's basically a chip in a piece of plastic that you insert into a slot on each machine which then calibrates to your first round while programming the chip.

The evil part is that this chip knows, it knows I tell you! I can't fake it now.

After the session to programme this evil piece of plastic, it was time to be measured and weighed. My boobs are shrinking. Nothing else is.

Soooooo goooooood!

I went for another torture training session this morning. Felt soooooo gooooood! Especially after I got stuck in the taxi strike action on Hans Strydom this morning. Spent about 15 minutes listening to music at full volume to drown out the noise around me. Until one of the drivers decided to berate the bus driver standing in the lane right next to me. Got a bit hairy there when he started bashing on the bus door with his sjambok. I was quite glad when the last of them finally went through and the road was open again.

Monday's workout

I dropped J&C off this morning, raced home to get changed into gym gear and sat on the couch. Until 7.50am. My first gym session started at 8am. I was cool, with my tracksuit pants, the tshirt that covers the love tyres around my waist and my bottle of orange juice and water. And my towel. Those eager little instructors descended on me to show me the gear and how to use it.

Now I don't know about any of you, but a gym for me has always been a war zone. Way back in the 90s when Health & Racquet first hit the scene, I got myself a gym membership contract. For the first six weeks I showed up religiously, got into doing water aerobics. The circuit scared the crap out of me with all the stuff you had to remember about all the machines. Then I developed the bladder infection from hell. I stopped going but still continued to pay my monthly fee. After the contract ended I never saw the inside of a gym again, until Friday when I joined up.

What I remember about my one and only gym experience were the gym bunnies, those over made up and over dressed little bodies that kept on going, and those machines.

At Curves, there was none of that. Oh there were some ladies there, but overall they looked like I did, overweight and underfit. I was done in 40 minutes. And my muscles don't hurt, yet.

I'm looking forward to Wednesday.

A gym membership

I'm a fat 40yo woman with curves in places whoever created us most certainly never intended. I have a stomach that wobbles like jelly whenever I lay on my back and laugh. I look like a beached whale when entrenched under the duvet in the middle of winter.

Due to my fatness, I have reflux, high cholestrol and a lazy arse that loves the couch. And chips with dip. Hey I like food ok?

Cardio Guy told me in January that I needed to exercise at my yearly appointment. It took a while but here I am, fresh from having paid an arm and a leg to join my local Curves. I start my first round of torture on Monday, followed by Wednesday and followed by Friday.

My survival plan includes :

1 Not turning into a gym bunny.
2 Drinking lots of wine.
3 Sweating so much that no one will want to talk to me.
4 Coming home and passing out on the couch mumbling insanely.
5 Drinking lots of wine.